Be strong…and ask for help

Hi everyone,

As a more introverted person I used to be terrible at asking for help. I would hold my worries in my head, let them rumble around for ages and only talk to friends about them once I’d decided on a solution. My friends used to get very frustrated with me when I actually told them what was going on because I hadn’t allowed them to help me, which is what I wanted to do for them. So it wasn’t a reciprocal relationship. They would tell me their worries and I would try to help but I wouldn’t let them do the same for me.

Sound familiar?

If you’re a more introverted person it is your natural style to be introspective and to try to sort out your problems for yourself.  More extraverted people will seek the opinions of others but typically, you won’t, or you will seek the support of a few people who are very close to you.  One of the wonders of age, for me, has been feeling more comfortable and confident about who I am and so I feel more comfortable and confident to talk about the things that are bothering me with my friends.  I let them see the real me, not just the bolshy bird who always seems to be fine.  Because I’m not, not all of the time, none of us can be.  So if you don’t have age on your side, try and confide in a few people to tell them your worries or write things down to help you process them and to let yourself see how well you’re making progress.  We are detailed and analytical thinkers so typically we will find a solution.  It’s just better to not have to do that on our own, all of the time.

As more introverted people, we naturally focus on the more negative aspects of life so it’s good to consciously focus on the positives too.  To be mindful I guess.  If the sun is out, acknowledge that and feel its warmth on your skin.  If it’s cold and rainy, what a fabulous time to snuggle up at home with a book, film and/or a loved one if you can.  It’s all about your perspective on things.  Introversion is not always easy; we see life in great detail and the world is not always filled with good things, so it can be a lot to take in and process.  By asking for help from people that we care about and acknowledging the positive aspects of our lives, to balance out the negatives we can build our strength and resilience to fight another day, with a smile ?

Have a great weekend.

Best wishes, Karen